Stress fracture
By TMX Archives on 6th Jun 03
is late. It should have been finished days ago when I said it would be done. But since I'm sitting here writing it, that obviously didn't happen. And it's not that I forgot about it or that I haven't had the time. THIS COLUMN is late. It should have been finished days ago when I said it would be done. But since I'm sitting here writing it, that obviously didn't happen. And it's not that I forgot about it or that I haven't had the time. Simply put, I haven't really felt that it was necessary to write it yet. Up until now, I haven't been under pressure to get the job done.I've always been this way - a master of procrastination. Throughout my years in school, I made an art of studying for exams during the 45-minute class just before the test. Any papers that needed writing were started, depending on the required length, between three and six o'clock the morning they were due (unless, of course, I could get an extension). But once I know my back is up, I get the job done, ploughing through from beginning to end. It's the way I need to work and probably the reason I've never finished my novel, opting instead to start it about 800 times.Ernest Hemingway's heroes were all defined by a shared quality, the famous phrase being 'grace under pressure'. Whether demolishing bridges, fighting bulls, or reeling in the fish of a lifetime, they didn't lose their cool when the real heat came down. Quite the opposite, in fact - they thrived and indeed were at their best in those moments. All distractions and earthly concerns were stripped away, all limitations were exceeded and all was taken care of.Me, I've never fought a bull or blown a bridge but I know something about what old Mr Hemingway was talking about. And from the tone of Sutty's last email, he needs some words. The deadline is now - words that will put the pressure on any writer, anywhere. This is what I've been waiting for.Kevin Windham, on the other hand, has never been the Hemingway Code type. The enigmatic racer has always handled pressure badly. When I was new to this sport, one of the first things I learned to do was watch for K-Dub's breaking point. You see, despite his natural speed - he's one of the fastest riders ever - Windham has never had the confidence that champions and Spanish matadors require. I would watch him lead the majority of a race and ride with dazzling smoothness and agility. But at some point, he would hear the competition - usually Jeremy McGrath or more recently Ricky Carmichael - and drop anchor. You could feel it, the exact moment that Kevin decided he couldn't win. And he wouldn't.Until this season, it had been about a year-and-a-half since I'd seen Kevin. He was going through...well, he was going through something. He'd taken to wearing tracksuits and large quantities of diamond-encrusted jewelry - not quite in character for a rural Louisiana boy. He'd developed a reputation over the years, the online bigmouths dubbing him 'K-Fade' and repeatedly criticizing his lack of heart.Windham's last professional race was the Atlanta Supercross in 2001. At least it would have been, had he not snapped his femur in half during practice. Following that injury, Kevin disappeared. Not just from racing but from the planet. He stopped returning phone calls - even from his close friends - and seemed destined to fade into obscurity.Just a few months ago, Windham was suddenly back. He did the occasional local race (and won, of course). And then, there he was on the starting gate at the Glen Helen National with his own Honda team and a new bike, the CRF450R four-stroke.I'd heard that Kevin was absolutely flying, that he looked almost unnaturally smooth on the big thumper. At round two, he even took a moto win. But until round three at Mt. Morris, Pennsylvania, I hadn't seen it for myself. The High Point National was a revelation. Windham got on Ricky Carmichael and never let him go. Lap after lap, he was right there. This wasn't the Carmichael runaway that I was used to - after all, RC won all 24 motos last summer. No, this was a race. And when the front of the pack disappeared from view and reappeared at the crest of the far hill, there was Windham, in front and looking like a new man. Ricky passed Kevin back and eventually took the moto win, though not by much. By the end, RC and K-Dub had about 30 seconds on third-placed Chad Reed.The second moto was similar, with Carmichael and Windham passing each other several times for the lead. Windham had to settle for second again. But even though he could only muster a 2-2 on the day, there was something remarkably different. That moment that I had become so used to spotting - the 'drop anchor' moment - never arrived. Kevin never gave up on himself. He handled the pressure gracefully.I'm not entirely sure what happened to Windham during his year in exile. I know that he patched up some family issues and he and wife Dottie had their first child - a girl. Maybe his time away along with his new role as a father has given him some perspective. The jewelry and hip-hop slang are long gone and the normally close-cropped K-Dub now sports a large, bushy mane. He looks like a different person. Maybe he just had to grow his hair out before he could let it down.Jeff Kocan, courtesy RacerX